Sometimes a great notion

Yes it's true I made a scary reference in the title itself. 'Sometimes a Great Notion' is a novel by Ken Kesey, the same guy who wrote One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Now the scary part of the reference is that it refers to an american folk song “Goodnight, Irene” which has a line in it that goes -

Sometimes I live in the country
Sometimes I live in the town
Sometimes I get a great notion
To jump into the river an’ drown

However, just to be on the safe side - no, I'm not contemplating suicide nor am I going all goth and emo on you. I just liked the name. Sometimes I' get a great notion. I forget it immediately scared of its significance.

Any ways I'd spent the whole of last month doing nothing. Went home, had an awesome time, home is always awesome and I guess it ranks above just about everything else so it's off the scale as well. Got back in touch with people I hadn't seen in a long time - another really wonderful thing. Went to visit friends on new years, well okay, not exactly. I'd gone for work - presenting stuff, getting money from the powers that be, conning the corporates into doing the boring bits ... the usual. The December trips were rather nice - a change from the usual grind.

Went to the crosswords there, while being corporate, it turned out to be totally useless. Spent four days in an office in T-shirt and Jeans while every one else was in relatively more formal clothes, 'twas silly of them to be like that. Spent new years with friends, which was a lot more fun than it would have been back here. The best part was being with Asthana, Karry, Neta - I've not felt so free and able to be me in a long time, it was like being back in college or home or something. I was me again, no superficial veneer, to be me in person and to be able to talk the way I do naturally and not have to 'tone myself down' for the benefit of people. It was liberating.

Then within a couple of days I went home again, the conference was there - and that was one of the best experiences I've had this year. Seeing as how the year just started, I'd be surprised to see you raise your eyebrow at that statement, but it's true. In fact since my last to last post in Nov. 2008, it would have been the best experience (notice the whole disregard all trips to home clarifier made earlier). That, that post was prompted by something that made me feel good for a day and this made me feel good for about three days, should give an example of how much fun it was. I did in fact hog my self on dessert, I did in fact ingnore the very pained look that the people who were serving us gave me, and their raised eyebrows. I realised that being shameless has it's advantages in highbrow places - you get to have more fun. The presentation went of rather well, I missed out on some serious drama cause I was rehearsing for my presentation but I got to hear all about it later on. I guess I should clarify, I'm not sure that my presentation went off well because I was on autopilot. I switched off, started talking and only regained consciousness around the end when some one asked me a couple of questions in that wonderfully incredulous voice. The questions were flattering along the lines of - "You did WHAT ?", "You seriously expect us to believe you did THAT ?", and "What in your opinion allowed you to do THAT ?". This coupled with getting to be home for three days made it all worth the travel.

Coming back was irritating, the train was four hours late. A friend of mine, a medico friend of mine to be more precise had asked me once - why and engineer ?. I guess saying something like I get to have fun works with most people, but those who end up doing the whole medicine line ? I guess they need a higher calling. "Doctors save lives, what on earth good does an engineer do ?", Now a question like that can only be answered with wit, intelligence and awesome. Not being all that of any - I just said something lame like you save lives, but we make lives worth saving and went off to sleep. However, recently I guess the fun just wasn't there any more, I couldn't sustain my self only on my work. That was scary. I had a fun weekend however, which seems to have taken care of whatever - mini-burnout, I'd suffered. One of the best weekends of the past three months. Yes, January seems to have been not only eventful but also rather awesome. I read these lines recently, it's a poem by tennyson it's called ulysses and these are the last six lines in it. I guess I can relate at times, feeling old and weary and tired does seem to be a positive feedback type situation.

Tho' much is taken, much abides; and tho'
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are,--
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

As for new music, nothing that I would jump up and down at. So I leave you with Coheed and Cambria, 'Welcom Home', for those who don't get it when they listen to it - the song has been inspired by Led Zep's 'Kashmir', the riffs follow. I wish this was the one song I can play on the guitar rather than the Nirvana one I've posted below. I get the feeling that if I try now I'll fail miserably at playing any song at all.

Also I just got the collection of Harry Belafonte, tears of joy/sorrow, thy name is nostalgia. So a bonus lyrics post of 'Mama Look a Booboo'

Led Zepplin - Kashmir


Oh let the sun beat down upon my face, stars to fill my dream
I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been
To sit with elders of the gentle race, this world has seldom seen
They talk of days for which they sit and wait and all will be revealed

Talk and song from tongues of lilting grace, whose sounds caress my ear
But not a word I heard could I relate, the story was quite clear
Oh, oh.

Oh, I been flying... mama, there aint no denyin
Ive been flying, aint no denyin, no denyin

All I see turns to brown, as the sun burns the ground
And my eyes fill with sand, as I scan this wasted land
Trying to find, trying to find where Ive been.

Oh, pilot of the storm who leaves no trace, like thoughts inside a dream
Heed the path that led me to that place, yellow desert stream
My shangri-la beneath the summer moon, I will return again
Sure as the dust that floats high and true, when movin through kashmir.

Oh, father of the four winds, fill my sails, across the sea of years
With no provision but an open face, along the straits of fear
Ohh.

When Im on, when Im on my way, yeah
When I see, when I see the way, you stay-yeah

Ooh, yeah-yeah, ooh, yeah-yeah, when Im down...
Ooh, yeah-yeah, ooh, yeah-yeah, well Im down, so down
Ooh, my baby, oooh, my baby, let me take you there

Let me take you there. let me take you there


---------------------------------------------------------------

Harry Belafonte - 'Mama Look a BooBoo'

I wonder why nobody don' like me?
Or is it de fact dat I'm ugly?
I wonder why nobody don' like me?
Or is it de fact dat I'm ugly?
     I leave my own-a house and go
     My children don't want me no mo'
     Bad talk inside de house dey bring
     And when I talk dey start to sing

cho: "Mama, look-a boo boo," dey shout;
     Dem mama tell dem, "Shut up you mout',
     Dat is you daddy." "Oh, no!
     My daddy can't be ugly so!"
     "Shut you mout', go away." "Mama look-a boo-boo dey."
     Ugh!
     "Shut you mout', go away."
     "Mama look-a boo-boo dey."

I couldn't even digest me supper
Due to de children's behavior
"John!" "Yes, pa!" "Come here for a moment,
Bring de belt, you're much too impudent."
     John says it's James who started first
     James tells the story in reverse
     I drag me belt from off me waist
     You should hear dem screaming all round de place

So I began to question de motha'
"Dese children ain't got no behavior!"
So I began to question de motha'
"Dese children ain't got no behavior!"
     "Dey're playin' wit' you," my wife declare
     "You should be proud of dem, my dear"
     Dese children were taught too bloomin' slack
     Dat ain't no kind of joke to crack

What they say

You know what they say about no risk no reward. Well that's stupid. There are somethings that are crucial, you don't take risks with them. People in the know, know what I'll be referring to what it is that I consider to be crucial to me. Now, there is something stupider than no risk no reward, that is taking the risk for a pointless reason for something which is that crucial. Here comes the cherry on top of it all, taking it when you rationally realise what is happening and still don't do anything about it - that is the biggest idiocy of them all.

That's what I just did. Now, off to sulk in my own solitude.

In The Waiting Line

Wait in line
'Till your time
Ticking clock
Everyone stop

Everyone's saying different things to me
Different things to me
Everyone's saying different things to me
Different things to me

Woooohh
Do you believe
In what you see
There doesn't seem to be anybody else who agrees with me

Do you believe
In what you see
Motionless wheel
Nothing is real
Wasting my time
In the waiting line
Do you believe in
What you see

Nine to five
Living lies
Everyday
Stealing time
Everyone's taking everything they can
Everything they can
Everyone's taking everything they can
Everything they can

Woooohh
Do you believe
In what you feel
It doesn't seem to be anybody else who agrees with me

Do you believe
In what you see
Motionless wheel
Nothing is real
Wasting my time
In the waiting line
Do you believe
In what you see

Ah and I'll shout and I'll scream
But I'd rather not be seen
And I'll hide away for another day

Do you believe
In what you see
Motionless wheel
Nothing is real
Wasting my time
In the waiting line
Do you believe
In what you see

Everyone's saying different things to me
Different things to me
Different things to me
Different things to me
Different things to me
Everyone's taking everything they can
Everything they can

So you think you can

Well, not exactly dance ? but closer to remain amoral. I did something today, it helped me. I also in a way did something that was ethically - incorrect.

It helped me though, it helped me a lot. Saying it out aloud is just one way to gain redemption, to be able to continue being amoral.

Still I'm Sad

See the stars come joining down from the sky
Gently passing they kiss your tears when you cry
See the wind the summer blow your hair upon your head
See the rain, the falling rain, it's great
Still I'm sad

All my sounds my tears just fall into days
They are driving the night will find they are lost
Now I found the wind is blowing time into my heart
When the wind blows hard we are apart
Still I'm sad

See the stars come joining down from the sky
Gently passing they kiss your tears when you cry
See the wind the summer blow your hair upon your head
See the rain, the falling rain, it's great
Still I'm sad

Still I'm sad
Oh heart, I'm sad
Still I'm sad
Oh heart, I'm sad

Speaking of benchmarks

Well episode 13 season 4 of scrubs was interesting, the most interesting thing in it however was the statement that JD made - "You're the one who is supposed to struggle, not me", hmm why does that sound familiar to me. It seems interesting to me that those of us who work on performance of systems don't worry too much with respect to our own performance ? How do you benchmark a human being ? when do you start thinking that a human being is obsolete and should be left to the pasture - whether he is 21 or 89. I've been told that these thoughts are 'an emotional trap', 'ego problems' and 'crazy talk'. Maybe we all really should be made to watch scrubs, just to get life lessons from it.

On the subject of benchmarks I have a couple of the more - 'gooey' things in life - those things that can't be defined with quantitative numbers. This is garaunteed to satisfy that itch to arrange, sort, serialise and stack. I present the 'Harry Potter' bench mark for fantasy novels. When you haven't read it but have read one of the harry potter series do as follows - take two books you read that the person whom you are talking to has also read. Now ask him/her (Let's stick to him for convinience) to rate the books you spoke of with respect to the harry potter series compare where you've put them with where he's put them. Now do the same for the book being refered to you. This lets you judge a couple of things, do your tastes match his, and how much weightage should the book be given. The second benchmark is for relating to a person how well an author has done with the book. Take the book - distill it into it's basic essence that is create a rough outline of the universe created by him. Now, think of what the most awesome things you could have done with respect to the same universe, now modify the universe slightly and do the same thing, do it a couple of times. Grade all the changes you made now go tell the idea to a person who has roughly the same taste as per the harry potter benchmark as you, ask them to grade it on the harry potter bench mark. Do not insert any bias at all and do the same with all the iterations you had. If you start scoring below harry potter as your number of changes increase, then place the idea above harry potter. If the increasing modifications doesn't have any correlation to the position in the benchmark put it along side harry potter, and if it decreases then put it below harry potter. We call this it iterative variant of the harry potter benchmark.

We also present here some ideas on the anime. The basic underlying point of some successfull (pop culture not rabid-anime-fan-escaflowne-is-godlike-or-I-kill-you-variety) 'collecting items'. That's right, I've revealed the basis of almost every successfull anime here - you need to collect stuff. Alright, so I've made an oversimplification, the point is - during each episode you need a monster of the week type situation which ties in well with the over all story line. There are very few ways of doing this in a formuliac manner - the simplest is to collect stuff. Take Bleach for example - you collect new zanpaktu's - not literally of course, but each week or couple of weeks you get to see a new type of sword with new powers and a new cool name and a new cool 'slogan' associated with it. This means that each week you get that craving to find out what happens this week, they feed you as little as they can get away with, and then drag it on untill next week. A benchmark for anime has not been fully developed, the use of bleach and naruto instead of harry potter is suggested, naruto seems to be a more popular option. Note that manga and anime both may be benchmarked the same way.

Now I've spent some time listening to Norah Jones, I think people should. Her voice is incredibly awesome, and the piano suits it well. So here is a song that I like a lot.

Norah Jones - Don't Know Why I Didn't Come

I waited 'til I saw the sun
I don't know why I didn't come
I left you by the house of fun
I don't know why I didn't come
I don't know why I didn't come

When I saw the break of day
I wished that I could fly away
Instead of kneeling in the sand
Catching tear drops in my hand

My heart is drenched in wine
You'll be on my mind
Forever

Out across the endless sea
I would die in ecstasy
But I'll be a bag of bones
Driving down the road alone

My heart is drenched in wine
You'll be on my mind
Forever

Something has to make you run
I don't know why I didn't come
I feel as empty as a drum
I don't know why I didn't come
I don't know why I didn't come
I don't know why I didn't come

Arise now, as a true academic.

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Use only the recommended fonts: Times, Times Roman, Times New Roman, and
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Sinc wave Sine Wave controversy

This is to help those poor souls who still end up on the wrong page despite my previous post go to the end of this post you'll find your sine and sinc explanation there. Since I used to turn to the internet for information while I had to deal with sines and sincs I'll help them out. Turns out search engine optimization is tougher than I thought, but this should nail it. I have the search terms in the title, and shall be referring to them once again in the body.

Now for the math. People interested in Sine and Sinc waves, or Sinc and Sine waves look no further a short summary is given below.

sin(pi*x)/(pi*x) can be called a sinc(x) wave, and from what I remember it is the result of a fourrier transform on a square wave. wider the square wave the sharper the sinc, the thinner the square the wider the sinc.

Like I'd said in my previous post- remember always - time frequency duality. That means that what looks like something (say X) in the time domain can look like something else (say Y) in the frequency domain. What is interesting is that if you have the shape Y in the time domain it will look like X in the frequency domain. I had a project I'd made that converted images to sound via their frequency a little more complex than I'd like, done in matlab though so shouldn't be a problem to most to make something similar the reason for using frequency - we know that the human eye has a range as does the human ear create a map for the extreme ends map to frequency take inverse fourrier voila - sound. Any one wonder what a picasso sounds like ?

Mada Mada Dane

To those of you who don't know what this means - boo. Well no, it means "You've still got a long way to go", like a taunt of sorts in japanese. The mada mada part is what makes it that - one mada is good, two mada's is bad ahh well what can you expect from a language with over 12 degrees of politeness (not to diss the language at all), atleast that's what harsha says.

A lot of the guys have left, in fact most have. I am surprised at how some feel they haven't coped too well and are lonely while others seem to be having a blast. Don't know. This post has been some time in coming, so I think I'll split it accross several closely spaced posts. For those that don't know - my lappy stopped working quite recently so I'm still kind of upset, send money and chocolates (and new laptops) to get me in a better mood. Ok, so now updates of a less morbid variety for those who want music I'd suggest muse if you haven't already tried it "Apocolypse please", "Stockholme syndrome" and "Assassin" being favorites untill my lappy breathed it's dying gasps. The Angra cover for Led Zep's Kashmir is of course also very very awesome. Kittie is good - but not all just some, especially those with the overlaid melodic with guttarals. Coheed and Cambria for those getting started is also pretty nice, but you need to stick with them a little, start with "Welcome Home", which is awesome.

While on the way from Home to work, which in case you didn't know of, I had gone home for about a month or so - mid June to mid July, I met this interesting auto guy. Now this is what he tells me and I repeat it as best I remember it. The secret to good health is to get up at 5 in the morning, drink water from a silver (or was it copper I forget, take silver - scientifically proven) thi s water should have been used for the germination of 'desi chana', not any other kind. Then excercise till about 6 or so, then work drink ganna juice around 12:00 or so. Have a light lunch drink not more than two cups of tea a day, do not induldge in anything excessively - don't do too much muscle building otherwise you'll regret it. Yes, and sleep at 1 or so that means about 4 hours of sleep a day not more, no chance. These tidbits of wisdom cost me about 30 Rs. extra - but then who am I to complain if the elixir to eternal life costs that much, it could easily be a lot more. Then is the people who I live around, that's for the next post though, their sense of morality is rather entertaining. Till then read the webcomic abstruse goose, XKCD-ish with more science and less tech.

I also realised a lot of people seem to get this page when they search for sinc waves and sine waves. People sin(pi*x)/(pi*x) can be called a sinc(x) wave, and from what I remember it is the result of a fourrier transform on a square wave. wider the square wave the sharper the sinc, the thinner the square the wider the sinc - remember always - time frequency duality.

Now that the lesson for the day is over we move onto the much awaited lyrics section.

Muse - Assassin

War is overdue
The time has come for you
To shoot your leaders down
Join forces underground

Lose control
With increasing pace
Warped and bewitched
Intend to erase
Whatever they say
These people out torn
A wild and bereft
Assassin is born (yeah)

Aim, shoot, kill your leaders,
Aim, shoot, kill...

Oppose and disagree
Destroy Demonocracy

Lose control
With increasing pace
Warped and bewitched
Intend to erase
Whatever they say
These people out torn
A wild and bereft
Assassin is born (yeah)
[Aim, Shoot, Kill...]

The guesstimator.

It has been some time since I last posted. Been busy with the papers of course, however I have been lazy as well as expeceted. I have of course just as every one already has - downloaded firefox 3 it's good, exactly what I need for a new browser the memory footprint is down with a little set of tweaks, it's as fast as required and it has all the eye candy any one needs . Sai has been obsessing over some pathetic twitter posts and blog or the other. As expected my contact with the others has been reduced, conversations on the net trickled down to a few lines a week - at best.

It seems as though there isn't much to write, there is of course, but nothing has been collated. I have been watching some TV series, some comedy central stuff there is a kid Demetri Martin he's rather good. Then there is George Carlin he's a little profane but otherwise insightful. On the whole a not very productive but also not unproductive week. The papers are coming along fine by the way. Music has started getting to be repetitive back to Rob Zombie I guess, although Fuel seems to be good as well, need some time off before I get back in the mood for TOOL. I got introduced to Muse - decent music progressive rock Coheed and Cambria are better but then they are different, Flower Kings and King Crimson are closer in style to them Super Massive Black Hole seems to be a decent song.

Fuel - Quater.

I know I'm dead before my time
I know It's coming down
If you could only see what's right
You'd see what's coming 'round

[Chorus:]
So I walk Alone
I ask no quarter friend
I walk alone
Til I find you again

I know no place to call my bed
But I know this thorny crown
If you would only feed your head
You'd see your hands are bound

[Chorus]

A sine wave ? is it a sinc wave? No it's Superwave !!

It seems that the fact that life has it's ups and downs is common knowledge, what isn't I guess is whether is high low structure is continuous like a since wave ? or sudden - discrete if you will, like a square wave. Do the highs or lows follow a pattern ? would the amplitude said highs and lows decrease over time ? will it increase will it oscillate rapidly varying with some random parameter ?(is it a stable ? decaying? or increasing ? wave). What is the Fourrier Transform of said wave form.

These and many other thoughts are going through my head now, now that I've left, now that I realise that my BTP was not as trivial as I thought as it was (designing a co-processor in a super computer - as an undergrad, not half bad is it ? - well I wasn't alone, but still a team of two.) - this being the high of the day. The fact that our design was not radically different from the one we were trying to beat, which came to light when I asked the guys who had come over to understand our design, a couple of questions and it becomes painfully clear that people can publish whatever they feel like, explanations don't matter, and that the work we had done, which seemed to be so revolutionary as compared to the others was in fact very similar to the work we were set out to beat.

Ahh .. sweet irony. Well not so sweet any ways, I heard a pretty interesting comment the other day, I'm talking about how the change in the electric field affects the magnetic field and vice versa in the case of Electro Magnetic Waves, and a guy says - "But damn it why does it move?", actually a very interesting question I know an electro magnetic wave has its E vectors, H vectors and Z vectors orthonormal to each other - but why must it have a Z vector at all ? I thought this has something to do with the equations of the wave when combined with whatever relativity Einstein cooked up - they only give a traveling wave equation. May be some one who is interested can model what a stationary (standing wave) version of an EM-wave would look like.

Let's see what else I left college - not tearful at all, I thought I may be but I wasn't. Some guys did come to see me off - that felt nice, I would have been much more worse off had no one come to see me off, I guess. Also I heard this song with respect to Delft's computer engineering department's unofficial video - it is a sad song but evokes a nice feeling, maybe because I have heard it in Harsha's room so often that I automatically associate it with that.

Honestly what will become of me
don't like reality
It's way too clear to me
But really life is daily
We are what we don't see
Missed everything daydreaming

[Chorus:]
Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to end?
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to an end?

Traveling I only stop at exits
Wondering if I'll stay
Young and restless
Living this way I stress less
I want to pull away when the dream dies
The pain sets it and I don't cry
I only feel gravity and I wonder why

Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to end?
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to an end?

Well the dogs were whistling a new tune
Barking at the new moon
Hoping it would come soon so that they could
Dogs were whistling a new tune
Barking at the new moon
Hoping it would come soon so that they could
Die die die die die

Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to end?
come to an end come to an
Why do all good things come to an end?

Well the dogs were barking at a new moon
Whistling a new tune
Hoping it would come soon
And the sun was wondering if it should stay away for a day 'til the feeling went away
And the sky was falling on the clouds were dropping and
the rain forgot how to bring salvation
the dogs were barking at the new moon
Whistling a new tune
Hoping it would come soon so that they could die.

Incidentally for those interested I have realised that method of visualising numbers that I use, it seems I hear them as compared to seeing them in my head, although I can see them and count if I try (without hearing them) - but that is strenuous, interesting to know though.

A Farewell

Well, since I ended up missing my own farewell I went to the dept. farewell (it shall be called VALFI from now on), it was a staid affair at least for the time that I was there. I was told that the VALFIs at the hostels are a lot more important and interesting. On the plus side, I got to have vanilla ice-cream with gulab jamun, a nice combo indeed.

I hunted on the net for VALFI and found a blog with a couple of links to it ... seems to be a guy from IIT-B himself.

http://kaustubhyn.blogspot.com/2006/04/start-of-valfi-s.html
http://kaustubhyn.blogspot.com/2006/04/my-valfi.html

Seems to be a sentimental thing. Well I got to have my share of food, the profs. made lame speeches about making sure that they kept the IIT-B name aloft etc. ... well I guess I am calling them lame maybe some people were inspired, but hey this is a subjective thing not an activist blog (there are wayy too many of those in my opinion). Any ways ... an interesting experience if there ever was one. You could kind of tell that the sentimentality of the situation had gotten to some of the people if not all.

Some points to note
- Seems that these guy had their endsems at this time (well 16th is one exam I know that for sure), so they could have their farewell this late so should we...
- Instead of titles to some people, they have profile readings (these are written by and read by your own batch mates it seems) and this happens for every one. It is way better and more senti as it should be (it also lasts all night).


Thats all I guess, I am sure that people reading/not reading this may/may not find this interesting. Any ways till then.

Hastalavista BayBee ...

So long, and Thanks for all the Fish!!!

As ussual, I have made a half hearted attemept at a witty title and yet ... not managed it. Any ways, I remember some time back, I was in 2nd year I guess, thinking to myself that the seniors were getting way to attatched to the college I mean they actually missed being there, and they liked it and ... well you get the general idea. Then during the 3rd year when we gave the seniors their farewell once again I was all gung ho about not caring for the college once I'd pass out.

Well ... Today is our farewell, which I wont get to attend cause of the fact that my BTP is outside, in BBay which is not all that far away, but prior comitments have been made and must be kept. This is the only thing I have against my juniors they kept the date at some akward time which is neither too close to BTP-1 in which case I might have managed to attend it, I managed synapse after all, nor too close to BTP-2 which I can't fault them for, cause they got their endsems at that time I guess.

Any ways, my point being that I had thought that I would not miss the college when finally my time came to leave. I was right of course, but I was wrong as well, I dont miss the place, what I do miss are the poeple. I mean I have spent 4 years of my life living with the same set of people, they are as close as friends can get, so although I cannot attend the farewell I am doing somthing else. I am ermm... wrting a sort of 'Thank you for ...." for a lot of the guys that I knew over the course of the 4 years, I will most probably miss out on most, that I did know, that isnt because I forgot them (though it might be), but cause - 1) I am lazy, 2) There isnt anything specific man .. it's just in general. So, for those guys I am thanking them right now for whatever interaction small or prolonged (yeah, poor you) we had. I had thought of making the list alphabetical or somthing, but thats too difficult so I'm jsut typing them just like that, randomised to remove any sembelance or priority.

• Thanks Harsha for a Bed even though you wanted to sleep, a fellow anime fan even though I spoiled them all for you, and well simpely for being you man ... For doing wiered things like not having chocolate, for doing SEN with me, for well .... being you ...
• Thanks Kayal for the nights of conspiracy theories cooked up, with wild political debates.
• Thanks Kaloo, thank you for the music, thank you for the songs your bringing . ..
  
• Thanks Pradeep for the bed even though you wanted it more, for allowing us to make your room the common room for the wing, for listening to the music that I forced upon you and finally for shouting yes to TOOL when Black performed it.
• Thanks Neta for not beating me to a pulp as yet, or strangling me in my sleep.
• Thanks Garry for being as wild as you are, for the time we took apart muskaan laptop, and for TAgiri bitching.
• Thanks Bharad for being one of the few I know interested in math and in culture :O ... I mean whoaa ...., oooh and also for that time we went to mica and were the 250Rs. area.
• Thanks Prakhar for being artsy man, life would have been a little duller without you.
  
• Thanks Muskaan and Gandhi for entertainment man ....
• Thanks Prof. for being awesomely sucky ;), being yet another victim of my taste in music, for orkut stalking with me, and then letting me use your account to orkut stalk others for all the good times man ... the bad times, the rants and the discussions on which was the best ship, for being the guy for awesome comics and games and series and for putting up with me.
• Thanks Kaus. for putting up with me whenever I was in your room, for bearing with me making prof. laugh, and for being witness to that time when I pushed prof. down the stairs. for bringing Neta and Bhuvan to my notice :D .... and for not losing your cool when I would try to rag on your instead.
• Thanks Akansh for putting up with me in all those projects, for copying allthose assignments with me and for well an ear whenever I needed to rant, and a sounding board for my ideas and for sticking with me through the DP, and RNB :D ... for being the few that took electronics with me, and remained for the love of the subject.
• Thanks Asthana, Pentium, Nikhil, all you guys for providing us with an endless source of entertainment, and then after an hour of being ragged on making us stop with just one line
• Thanks Ravi, cause you are da Man !!!
• Thanks Pyro and Divey for being the two I know who have heard Belafonte.
• Thanks to all the girls of my batch for providing me and my friends with endless entertainment based on wild speculation, heated discussions and juicy gossip, without you guys(girls --wotevah), life owuld have been a lot more boring, and time would have passed a lot more slowly and pointers would have been a lot higher(well not really there is still the net but .... you get the picture :D ..)..
• Thanks to karry, cause you are the laziest guy I can imagine, and you still teach people a day before your own exam,
• Thanks to minni for being the few who took up cause for my own meme -- "Bloody Hell priety Sabbarwal" when every one else was shouting "This is Sparta"!!
• Thanks Ari for trying to burst the bubble around my head by making me think you were letting me win in arguments (he wasnt, he lost each time, but he did it so that every one thought that he was letting me win).
• Thanks Akhil for inflating my already inflated head by letting me win in arguments, even though you could easily have won each and every one, and also for calling me for cake that one time, and for being the butt of every joke from 4th sem onwards, and for not killing me while I slept for each time that I beat you up.
• Thanks Rahul Reddy for the Bourne Identity and others, my first ludlums, not great but time pass nonetheless.
• Thanks Divey for ermmm being nice, the very few nice people I know man and you are one of them
  
• Thanks to Harsh, Nimish Ari and the rest for their "Awesome" ness (not!!!), well Harsh is the gawdFather if nothing else thanks for being that man. And for company during the GRE crap.
• Thanks Bhuvan who will now give me a job, cause he will be a bigshot by the time I get out of Grad school (if I ever get in that is ...).
• Thanks Nirmal for being the only Kishore Kuma Listener between two Metal Heads.
• Thanks Sai, for the walks in the morning and being as shameless as me, and the always interesting Mac Vs. All debate. (you are in the RDF, there is even a paper on it now)
• Thanks to Kutte cause you put up with me during two months or was it one ? of RI, without killing yourself, esp. since I was going through my japanese words phase about then.
  

And now of course I follow up with the lyrics to a song, this one is stuitable for the occasion, its called 'The Graduation Song, it's by Vitamin C- apt I think, though I am sure I am a little too sentimental at the moment.

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
And then we got real cool
Stay at home talking on the telephone with me
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

1 - As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can we ever find a job that won't interfere with a tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels

Repeat 1

La, la, la, la�
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la�
We will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

Repeat 1 (3x)

ok so I had tried to link to everyones blog/orkut profile but blogger seems to be making it difficult for me so, I'll leave that for another day ...

Ahh, Updates, Updates, Updates

Interesingly, there isn't much to update any one on. Started doing python for fun, have been reading a lot, mostly the old perry masons and I read a couple of Grishams books, but thats it. Nothing else, at all, seriously.

Well there is some stuff, but I'll post that once what I have thought is organised well enough. By the way the Star Wars extended universe is amazing, and I mean seriously amazing. I actually felt bad when they killed characters. That and G. R. R. Martins books, he of course kills characters with a ruthless regularity that is scary. I'll post links to sites later on, in the meanwhile, google for them and you will see what I mean. Of late Caltech seems to be an interesting place to be in, mostly because I have decieded that I shall not do stuff that isn't fun, and I thin that Caltech might be fun.

"Th-th-th-that's all folks!"

Ok, Day 3 (With all the spelling mistakes)

There was this DJ thing that took place in the FC, lots of dancing, sadly no girls this time, there was the DJ night on the 1st night itself that I think I forgot to mention. Yes, sad to say I did dance, both times, I was wearing black though so no one could see anthing other than jeans moving the 1st night- there were also GNLU girls dancing with us, the second time was in broad daylight - which I think I'll end up regretting for the rest of my life.

Jokes apart, I sat through one of the worst footloose competitions in the entire history of synapse, well -- worse than the last two years any ways. it was just the same set of guys doing the same set of things again and again and again and .... Our college won the group thing ... Dance coders were pretty decent ..., in the small duration between the end of the performances and the announcement of the results there was a short performance by these two kids (couldnt be older than 6 ?) to that aamir khan number from taare zamin par - those guys got the max amount of cheering from the audience. Annnd there was this girl from Nirma who had come a day late for naach so she performed but wasnt judged, she was in my opinion pretty good - could have given srujith and company a run for their money, had she come in time.

Then at like 9 or so RagnaRok started, it was good !!! just on the wrong day. I wish that they had had ragna yesterday, and Cynosure right after that ? or Today. There were a total of 8 teams, the last one was HTB (the DAIICT team), or Hum toh Bajayenge ('We Will Play' in Hindi, or maybe 'We will Beat Up' it can mean both), they had their last time together , it was a laugh kind of. The Bands played Trivium (they messed that one up -Lights to Flies), and Pearl Jam (I forgot to mention that Black Played Pearl Jam as well - they played the song Black). The band that won it in the end was Manefus(it means royal eagle in egyption they claim) I think, and the Best Drummer went to Nephalim(means band from hell), the Best ohh forget it. Listen to them all at - tempostand Along with Black, all brought to you by Naman, Thakur, Ujjawal and well I dunno. ...

Feel like dancing, they should have kept the DJ night tonight itself, too much unused energy need to burn it off, which is why this post.

See who ever it is who reads this 'kind of regularly', after I guess another couple of months ? or maybe some weeks, who ever it is have fun.

This one is about synapse day 2.

The previous post despite my crappy spellings did kind of give a rough idea of what happened on day 1 of synapse. Now, we move on to day 2. Day 2 had the following major events - cynosure, Raphsody (the Indian and the instrumentals) and Naach the 'classical/Indian' dance competition. Ok, so the Raphsody was ok, nooot all the great, the instrumentals were good, but the others were ok, Kiriti did a good job, I think most of the people did actually enjoy his version of the colonial cousins and A Band Of Boys - medely I think they did it pretty seemlessly. During some break in the performances Prof. Hrishikesh Venkatraman, was asked to sing, he was sporting enough to do so, though the crowd didn't seem to think much of it, in my opinion he was decent.

What else, let's see ... I think the only thing I remember about Naach was srujith's dance, which was the same thing he always does that Chandramukhi(Bhool Bhulaiya) one, it was good of course, don't remember the results.

There was procenium of course, I think our college did a decent job, the others were kind of saaad, corny jokes being repeated, and gags being shown jsut for the sake of getting a laugh without the story heading any where. Our's was first somthing about hostages being divided along religious lines, then there was Symbiosis which in my opinion was crap, then there was DEC, which again sucked, by the time ours (1st years I think)came again I deceided I wanted to eat so I left so I missed it but I think it would have been decent. Mica was good, seriously good.

Then came the event I think every one was waiting for, Cynosure was good , seriously good. There were two bands, Agnee and Black, Agni is the one that has done that theme song for MTV roadies. They had stage presence - Mohan, Koko, Arijit (Chinku), and the guy on the synth (can't remember his name), I met them all as well, but alas didn't go fanboy on them and didn't get photos with them, though I am sure I must be visible in some of the photos that all the girls had taken with them. Agnee was good, but Black was awesome, made staying back worth it. They did their originals and some seriously good covers (by good I mean the choice of songs, they claimed their covers sucked -- I couldn't notice any big messups). They did TOOLs sober, they did a very intersting version of Hotel California, they did some other stuff - one original was called field of thorns I think.

Then they left, well almost, Arijit from Agni was up there on a chair (like 3 feet away from me and almost falling off on top of us), coordinating the crowds chants with a "get back" and etc. etc. ... Finally they did come back, but didn't know what to play (couldn't play snow patrol or RATM), so they played Led Zep- Stairway to Heaven. which was awesome. !!!

This was at like 3 or so at night ... so ... that was the end of Day 2.

Hmm.. it has been a long time since I last posted, and it will be some time again for my next post. The current one will be about synapse.

this one is about synapse day 1.

Ok, so this year(2008), Synapse was organised by our juniors. and personally I didnt expect them to do much of a job. I spent the whole day doing nothing of course, since I had decieded in my first year itself not to take part in any event that causes me to spend all three days working for said event rather than having fun. Any ways the day was a bore, it seems like hte juniors hadn't dont much with respect to the small events. Went to the SAC and there was hardly anything going on. I had a talk with harshal he was the one who told me that they were having small problems and would most probably sort them out by the next day.

Any ways, for the 1st day, the major events AFAIK were Raphsody and Rampage. Raphsoday went of decent, the third year guy once again decieded to murder pink floyd, Don't know how they let the guy in each year - dunno how he passes the prelims. There was this set of NID girls who were pretty decent, they seemed to be rather good friends as well. Karry played, and was of course good, they didnt win however. I went away for the results, and I was told that it was the girls from NID who won. There were people from GNLU as well but they were jsut O.K.

I have of course not forgotten about the streetplay but defered mention of it to a later time- namely now. Any ways, that was decent - I missed junoons performance but I heard they were good as always, I got the performance of that all girls team, they were pretty decent. Symbi sucked a lot, in the street play.

Rampage was the major event and it was of course what these guys had put majoriy of their effort in. I think they were pretty decent though. Two rounds the first one had the theme tribal - in which despite choosing 'models' that I would not have, they did pretty decent. The second theme was retro/rodeo, the first team did rodeo, they actually did look rather decent in their cowgirl outfits, every one else did retro. What is messed up is that our own team did god knows what with the theme they ended up seeming like some wiered, going-on-a-mario-electronica-LSD-Shroom-trip. NIFT won, they did their second theme well, I think we should have done decent, won it I guess.

Makes me wonder why is NIFT so good at this stuff, I mean they learn how to make clothes and stuff right ? not how to be on the Ramp ? I mean we learn how to design electronic circuits not how to purify the HCl required for cleaning the Silicon wafers etc. I mean isnt that some one elses job ?

Have you ever beat up anyone with just your bare hands ?

I havent, atleast not beaten any one up. I have hurt people, I have caused pain, excruciating amounts of pain. But I have never actually punched people in the face, not repeatedly not once, not at all. I have choked, twisted joints, jabbed and in general caused discomfort.

What I wonder is, is the fact that I never punched a person, does it make me a better human being ? after all, I have never punched a person. I mean that has to count for somthing right ?

hmmm, I was talking to T.S. it is interesting to do so, he has kind of unique views on lots of things, not so much on many others, and some that match mine. His statement that there is no such thing as free will, which he did try to prove via a thought experement and a series of well thought arguments did strike as being not just interesting but also provoking.

I just heard this line recently - "I love being alone, I just prefer being alone when there's other people around.", it was in this episode of 'Boston Legal'

This line was in this movie called Witness for the prosecutions, "He is a drowning man grasping at razor blades"

And this one is ofcourse from the Metallica song no leaf clover:- "So it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of the tunnel was jsut a freight train coming your way"

I had more to write it's just that I forgot what I wanted to write. So more next time I guess.

Interesting experements in sleep deprivation. It seems that if a student has too much cofee before the exam, the effects dont wear off untill his holidays are over untill and unless there is another exam within a time of T, in which case he will need another cup of coffee within T/4 of finishing this one.


I have come to the realisation that my posts have kind of been catering to the lowest common denominator, I see connections that I feel are awesome, patterns that I think are hilarious, but don't mention them because I feel no one else can. Pride does come before the fall, hopefull this gentle self motivated descent shall not hurt too much. From now on, I will make the obscure references that I wish to, not bothering about who/what/eh? will read this. The signal after all is free and nothing should stop it (in case you didn't get it that was refrence number 1).

Did I mention I just hacked a site, all on my own, I got this idea that maybe an SQL injection would work, tested it out in the most painless manner possible and then omg!!! access. No, I am not publishing details, anonymous remailers have been used along with the Tor service (to which I am much indebted, at the moment) explaining to them their vulnerbility.

The following is an attempt at writing a morbid lyrical poem, using quotes I remember, so realise that the phrases are not mine just the ordering and other such "Aesthetics". Can I wonder though, the phrase morbid lyrical be used in any context other than wiered doom metal, or awesome goth music ?

....

Everyone hides who they are
I can't help it. I kill things.


Beneath the surface,
I see pain.
even understand pain.
I just can't feel pain

Blood sets my teeth on edge.
Blood is my life,
Blood controls the chaos.
Pulsates in me like in you.

preparation is vital.
No detail trivial
and the ritual intoxicating.
The rush I feel,
The shadow takes over.

I can't kill yet.
I'm drifting.
I finally get a chance
to kill and I can't do it
I need another therapy session.

My mask is slipping.
my dark passenger
loses control, becomes powerless,
and I lose it all.
If I had a heart,
It might be breaking.

Ahh, finally
no cliched darkness,
no cliched chill,
only what I craved.
The sweet release
of dopamine, as I die.

....

urgh!!! too surreal, lets see stuff about it though, and I swear these are all quotes from a TV show, with some minor modifications (I removed 'I', added a comma, broke it up etc. Minor and cosmetic changes only) Ok the first stanza starts with a B, there are four lines the last three end with pain. The second one starts with a Blood in the first three, and the final line starts with a P. The next stanza is 5 lines, so is the next one. The final two are 6 lines each. Did I mention that I drew out the whole death thing dilabrately (yes there was no mention of dopamine that was my line). There was this quote in 'House' though, about why he cut himself so that it released endorphins and dopamine and some such.

Listen to 'Welcome Home', by Coheed and Cambria, then listen to Led Zep's Kashmir, the riffs sound so similar that I'm sure the coheed and cambria thing is the same as the kashmir riff with only the spacing between successive sounds being different. I would say this is one of the greatest tributes these guys could pay to Led Zep, well apart from stating the Led Zep is the greatest of course. I like the concept they have with their albums in Coheed and Cambria.

hmm.. these are some of the about me's I was hoping to find on Orkut but didn't and some that I did.

Surreal

Oh look at me everybody I like to reveal my entire character to total strangers.....not.
About the religion part:
I'm neither catholic nor agnostic.I'm not an atheist either.God and I are just taking a break from each other.

dirty football studs. rusty old guitar. time travel paradoxes. passive smoking. cold water showers. bad hair days. chicken burger. with extra cheese.... yeah!!!
____________________________

Little secrets, tremors... turned to quake...
The smallest oceans still get... big, big waves...

hmm... these are some of them, there were funny ones, cool ones etc. Don't feel like doing this now. Does it matter ?

In case some one was interested I think the 15th or the 14th one of the two was blog activism day. My sentiments on this were best expressed by CmdrTaco at slashdot, and thus I'm using his quote.

You can almost hear the sound of the vacuum created by bloggers thinking that their words matter when the people with control don't even know how to read the tubes. Lick a stamp or march- that's harder to ignore.

Ok this has been some time in the coming now. There isnt much that I have to say though, can't for the life of me beleive that people actually read this. Life in college is dull as ussual or is it ? dunno, people have been winning stiff, I am getting some kind of stuff done, I have way too many projects on hand, not enough enthu it seems. I want to go home now, but home has changed, does it matter ? no not really but still .. it has changed and what was once home no longer is.

I wonder at the lack of blog posts made by my batch mates nowadays, after all my seniors did seem to keep theirs a lot more up to date, then again I cant complain, I post on slashdot than I do here. I wonder if I should continue this however, mostly because I dont like this whole - "opening my self up to the world" nonsense. I hate having my photos taken, and yet lament at the lack of photos containing me, its wiered. I am a hypocrite, and I personally hate everyone who believes they arent, everyone is a hyppocite they just refuse to admit it, kind of making the crime worse.

Social networking sites are a new interest, it is indeed possible to watch people interact there and be entertained for atleast one day. That ofcourse requires that you have a like minded friend with you, so that you can discuss how lame some people are (those that have written their life stories on line), and how cool some people are (this one girl has actually heard lacuna coil - how cool is that ).

Lets see, we have covered a random set of topics I have ranted about my likes and dislikes and ermmm... I dont know what else to do. So what I do now is insert this poem/song/whatever and distract you while I come up with somthing else to write.

......

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

......


I am supposed to be working at the moment, some spice thing or the other, its no fun do I want to be doing this for the rest of my life ?

do you think that I am opening my self up here on the net, do you think that anonimity grants me that much false confidence. I dont know may be all of this is elaborately engineered to look as though I am opening up, maybe I am actually opening up does it matter ? Just beacuase I realise that the matrix exists doesnt mean I'll take the red pill - or does it ?

A lot of really sarcastic and snide comments are just waiting to burst forth, while I hold them in why dont you examine a poem written by Frost, and look at the comic at XKCD, and also for those of you completely unaccustumed to absurdist humour, here is another XKCD link, donot forget the alt-text(tooltip) that comes when your mouse hovers over the picture (I personally think that an Alarm at Chocolate would have been more effective).


The Poem:- Fire and Ice

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.

From what I've tasted of desire

I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice,

I think I know enough of hate

To say that for destruction ice

Is also great

And would suffice.

just a sentence hope you get it, or atleast what I meant by it.

The clouds are rivers that were the sea...